*Note - The following answers are based on numbers, effectiveness and other 'powergaming' priorities. If you want to roleplay a female dwarf paladin who only uses Flash of Light, be my guest.

Which race should I choose?
The real answer? Whatever persona and look you wish your Paladin to have. My powergamer-i-wish-human-traits-didnt-suck answer?
Dwarf. Human racial traits are almost as laughable as Troll (perhaps more so). There is absolutely zero advantage to being a human, while Stoneform is handy by itself. The recently buffed 'Perception' is still a joke, since clearly if you already know a rogue is nearby, many other classes have much better ways of exposing them. So do some of you, infact, and its called 'Consecration (Rank 1)'.

Which talents should I choose?
First, we have this -
https://forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.aspx?fn=wow-paladin&t=62159&p=1&tmp=1#post62159
Then, we have this -
http://www.thottbot.com
Use them wisely. Play your Paladin and recognize which abilities you find yourself using most. Do you like a challenge? Take Protection. Do you like pretending to do Damage? Take Retribution. Do you like to think that your character is a really Cleric? Take Holy.

Okay but I'm just starting a Paladin and..
Five points into Spiritual Focus, 10 random points into Retribution which are essentially irrelevant, 1 point into Command. Then go 5 points into Illumination, 1 point into Divine Favor. Voila. You can now level to 60 with ease. From there, respec as your desires dictate.

Why should my group expect me to heal?
Because you have healing spells. Good healing spells. Holy Light is one of the best heals in the game on the merit of casting speed, efficiency, and its raw size. Add Blessing of Light and it is the best heal in the game. I dont care how much you want to be a warrior, if you have mana and your healer is stressed, you had best stop everything you're doing and heal. Holy Light is not too slow, you're just not concerned with your party's health. My motto is - "Heal first, fight later"

..but I didn't sign on to play a healer?
Then you sir have a wonderful class all for you. It is the 'Warrior', and is very good at what it does.

JotC? SoL? what?
So.. - Seal of
Jo.. - Judgement of
Bo.. - Blessing of
J - Justice
tC or Cr - the Crusader
C - Command
L - Light
R - Righteousness
W - Wisdom
F - Fury
K - Kings
P - Protection
S - Salvation/Sanctuary/Sacrifice (most people just say Sanctuary. Extremely few even know Sacrifice exists.)
M - Might

Are blessings as annoying as they seem?
Yes. They are. Use this - Buff Ahoy (http://www.curse-gaming.com/mod.php?addid=372). Yes, you are expected to keep them up during all battle times. If your group harasses you for not having a Blessing up during downtime (with the sort-of exception of Blessing of Wisdom) you are allowed to tell them "Oh well, I guess Im just a DPS Paladin" and 'forget' to heal.

What Aura do I use?
97.56% of the time, Devotion. Sure, it might not seem like much to you, but to your cloth buddies its a godsend. Use resists when necessary (ie, your group members cannot buff it on you) and Concentration whenever someone is channeling something in the line of fire (Blizzards, Hellfires etc). Sanctity when you're really bored. Retribution when you're soloing. You dont need more defense while you solo, you need every single point of damage you can scrape out.

My soloing speed seems very slow. How can I fix it?
If I meet one more Paladin who complains of slow soloing and doesn't have maxed out First Aid, I will scream. Just because you can heal doesnt mean you should be wasting mana doing it. The only heal you should ever cast while you solo is one that is Divine Favor/Illuminated. Or if you're dying for some reason. Otherwise, bandage away. And now for the biggest hint of all, if for some reason you must grind, grind on UNDEAD. You'll have plenty of use for all that extra mana you're saving now that you don't burn it on downtime heals.

My DPS stinks, I want more DPS, Paladins need more DPS, do paladins ever get good DPS? etc etc etc
First of all, roll a rogue. I have a rogue. I love my rogue. The DPS is off the chain. I log on to my rogue whenever I am feeling frustrated by my DPS impotence. Now, for the matter of Paladin DPS, let's examine some key points -

DPS - Damage per Second. Your DPS is irrelevant without a time frame from which to judge. A good benchmark is damage per fight. Because Paladins are so proc heavy, you will see massive variance in your day to day fighting. Don't let either fool you - You cannot churn out more DPS than a rogue, but you do far more damage than a mage with a wand. Go grab Damagewatch -(http://www.curse-gaming.com/mod.php?addid=40) This will give your DPS from beginning to the end of the fight without displaying the spikes or the valleys.

Burst vs Sustained - Paladins have decent sustained DPS. Given that the best damage a Paladin can do over time costs a measely 55 mana every 30 seconds, you can go on forever. Burst damage, incidentally, a Paladin is also very good at. Few classes can achieve the levels of burst damage a properly equipped paladin can. The caveat is that it is only partially under your control when it happens. At the most, you can use Holy Shock and/or a JotC->SoR->JoR. At best, you will be waiting for big Command procs. Paladins would be the absolutely most powerful class in the game if they could have controllable burst DPS. Stop asking for it. The old Holy Strike was +280 damage instant that turned all damage holy. If we had this ontop of our current seals we would truly venture into the realm of godhood. A paladin could easily stack Holy Strike and Shock into a combo that will easily out burst a rogue. This clearly cannot happen. Currently, if you want the most burst DPS possible, go 35holy/16 retribution. Or anything inbetween that gets you Shock + Command. Better yet, roll a warrior. They have huge burst DPS. If you want the most DPS possible, get Consecration and drop it during big AE fights. Throw in Holy Wrath for good measure and you'll easily see 1000+ dps spikes. Enjoy.

What is PPM?
This is essential to understand since basically every single Paladin ability is based on some sort of PPM. PPM stands for proc per minute, and is a number assigned to a proccing effect. These include SoR, SoC, SoL, SoJ, SoW. Suppose SoC has a PPM of, oh, 8. This means that if a weapon can potentially swing 8 times in a minute, it will have a proc rate of 100%. Realistically, even the slowest weapons swing more like 15 times a minute. With a PPM of 8, a 3.8 weapon would have roughly a 50% chance to proc on each swing. Remember, its the percentage that counts. Just because an effect is PPM does NOT mean it will always reach that number. Sometimes you will get more in a minute, sometimes less. PPM just allows the procs to be even across different weapon speeds. This is why Command is the best with slow weapons - far more reliability that Command will go off in any given fight. Bolovan's testing indicates that Command has a PPM of 6. See here - http://forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.aspx?fn=wow-paladin&t=184521&p=1&tmp=1#post184521

Valor or Lightforge?
Both. Theres really no reason to choose. Valor when you solo/grind, LF when you group. Please, LF when you PVP as well. Mana is your life blood. The best Retribution Paladins are the ones with 18%+ crit AND 4k mana. Yes, its possible. Valor is a crappy tanking set. Get real tanking armor if thats what you do.

Is there any point to ranks of Command?
No, unless you're a stun happy Protection Paladin who wants to use the Judgement of Command. In which case, smash your head against the wall until Blizzard gets a clue about the ridiculous diminshing returns on Seal of Justice.

Holy Shock vs BoK vs Repentence?
Holy Shock - Is. Not. For. DPS. Holy Shock is - a pulling spell, a very tactical PvP nuke (you will be at a significant 1v1 advantage with Shock, almost as much as Repentence) and the only way to produce burst DPS when you need/want it. Max Holy Shock before items.. (Sanctity, JotCr, Imp Crusader) ~490. Crit for 735. Holy Shock is also the best 'taunt' you can get. JoF -> Shock is a great way to snap aggro.
BoK - Great all purpose Blessing. Believe it or not, BoK is very useful but not as situational as practically every other Blessing. Even Blessing of Might has more effective usage. BoK is an amazing raid buff, though. However, assume that basically every other Paladin has it.
Repentence - This is the 1v1 god ability. You can outlast just about any opponent with skillful use of this. Its also very useful in PvP as a casting interrupt. Its basically gouge for Paladins. Too bad the rest of the tree (especially the prereqs) are heinous.

Sanctity vs Consecration vs Holy Shield?
Sanctity - If you're piling on the damage, or have the misfortune of grouping with a Smiting priest, its great. This talent needs a buff.
Consecration - Awesome ability. Ironically the best tanking ability a Paladin has. This will grab you a significant amount of AE aggro. Rank 1 is a great rogue destealther, and the full rank is a decent way to rack up some AE damage. You need a lot of mana to use Consec well. Like I said, Retribution Paladin or not, you need mana.
Holy Shield - Very handy ability. This, combined with Consec, makes you a very decent tank. You'll need a zillion mana to keep them both going. Stock up on them Eagle items. Also known as the rogue killer.

Why do Judgements suck so much?
I dont know. I cry about this every couple days before I goto sleep.

Toughness vs Anticipation vs Parry?
1h_shield - Toughness, Parry, Anticipation
2hander - Parry, Toughness, Anticipation
Anticipation is a waste of 5 points. The crappiest +Defense items START at +10. Remember that Parry is more useful for PvP, but that it is now directional (only opponents in front).

Flash of Light?
This is still hotly debated. Basically, the only time you should ever use Flash is when your target has Blessing of Light on it. With BoL, FoL is infact pretty damn good. Without it, learn to anticipate and use Holy Light accordingly. By the time you start running Onyxia/Core and all you do is spam FoL, your job is easier then.

How do I keep aggro?
Seal of Fury is absolute crap. However, its all we got. The basic rotation is SoF -> JoF. Just keep judging it every 15 seconds. Here are the addons.
Shock - Very effective to bump up the hate list
Consec - Just like a shock, but less instant. And AE.
Holy Shield - Shield requires that you are being hit, but if you have already gained aggro, Shield will definitely help you keep it.
What if I dont have Shock, Shield or Consec?
Respec immediately.

What weapon should I...
Reaper. There are tons of secondary choices, but Reaper is the clear winner. Obviously, if you can get your hands on a Typhoon or Thunderstrike or something similarily purple, use it. But if you have a Reaper already, dont throw it away. Some notable mentions off the to of my head - Doomsaw, Hammer of Titans, Malown's Slam, Arcanite Defender etc.

Okay, but what enchant?
Crusader if you want the big numbers. Icy Chill is useless. Fiery and Lifesteal are far too insigificant on such a slow weapon. Unholy weapon? Hahaha. +9 Damage is decent, its basically another 2 DPS. +9 Int is my personal choice. Cant go wrong with a 130hp, 135mana beast of an axe.

Should I ever bother judging?
Not really. Dont even pretend to bother unless you're relatively sure the fight will last the full 30 seconds.
Judging Wisdom - Judgement of Wisdom now procs on all ranged, all spells. Everything. Keep this in mind. If you have any amount of casts in the group, Judging Wisdom is decent.
Judging Light - Also works on everything now, but far less useful than Wisdom, since 1 point of mana is worth roughly 3-4 hps when healers make the conversion. If you have a melee heavy group, go ahead and judge light.
Judging Justice - Yes, you will need to do this, but then blacklist the idiots in your group because everyone has a better snare than you. Even priests.
Judging Command - Since you're always using Rank 1, no.
Judging Crusader - This is hit and miss. Sometimes in PvP it's very useful, since Crusader will bump up your Holy damage by about 30%. Especially useful against undead things that you will be Exorcising. If you absolutely must use Righteousness, then JotC is more appealing but still mana heavy.
Judging Righteousness - If you're really bored or a Protection paladin who doesnt have room for Command in your build, you might just have to. Alternatively, dont even attack and just use Holy Shield. JoR is really that bad. Fully talente and JotC on the target, JoR is o-kay. Just barely.
Judging Fury - Always when you tank. Always.

How do I use Divine Intervention?
Its tough. You have to read the right. In general, the more your priest/paladin/druid know about how DI works, the better chance you have it making it work. If its a bad pull, throw everything on your other healer to keep them up - BoP, heals, LoH even. If all that fails, just make sure they are in a spot where mobs will NOT be after the rest of the group wipes. Then, tell your party to die once you've fired off the DI. Good luck. This will, incidentally, save raids.

Should I use Cleanse?
For the sake of all humanity, bind cleanse to something real easy like Middle mouse button or SPACE BAR. You should be cleansing absolutely everything immediately. It is one of your most powerful abilities. Use it well.

Why does our Epic Mount (require a random drop, require mana to cast)?
I dont know either. With Rank 3, you can buy your very own human epic mount for 800g. On my server, that saves me about 300g off the epic paladin price, and I dont have to bribe guild mates into doing Scholo. Good luck.